Stay in the game
Six million biological women enter menopause every year in the U.S.
Solving the health challenges that menopause brings is more about empowering women to lead the best “2nd half” of their lives than keeping their skin and vaginas from drying out and fitting in their skinny jeans. Menopause is like halftime at the big game. You need to go into the locker room, figure out what worked and what didn’t in the first half of the game, get your head and body right and go back out to attack the second half.
But the “get your head and body right” part is undoubtedly tougher during this time. The fact of the matter is, hormonal disruption can wreak havoc with moods, sleep, concentration, energy – the fires of youth can feel, very much, like they’re waning. Slowly tamping down with only embers left. How many women (or men for that matter) do you talk to in their late 40’s and 50’s that are excited to tell you how great they feel? How much their joints DON’T hurt and how much hot sex they’re having with their partner? I know, right?
How are all these people (more than 6 million biologically-born women enter menopause every day in the U.S.) going to feel like running the half marathon or learning to be a yoga teacher, going back to school, asking for the big promotion, re-entering the workforce after 20 years if they don’t feel their best? It’s like getting in the locker room at half time with a fever and chest congestion and having to go play the best game of your life for another 45 minutes.
Make no mistake, we need women functioning at their very best in order to continue to contribute to their families, communities and the world. There’s a big evolutionary advantage to having post-fertile women engaged and contributing for the greater good.
Women 45+ are still very much still the caretakers: raising children (if they have them), caring for friends, aging parents or other family members. They might be going back to work as empty nesters or considering new/different careers after their children have left the house. They might be working two jobs if they have become underemployed after being age-ed out of their long-time jobs. Maybe their spouse / partner has had their own work struggles. Make no mistake: it’s a big drain on society if these women are suffering from low energy, feeling lousy and depressed! Their families, communities, their tribes – the world, needs them. But it’s hard to bring your best if you can’t sleep, trip into a blind rage in the prescription line at the pharmacy and are literally, a sweaty hot mess.
The tragedy in it all is that this population has been completely ignored by the medical profession. I can’t tell you how many stories I’ve heard from women about doctors who did the verbal equivalent of a head pat and sent them along with “it’s natural…just deal with it.” Or “your mom and grandma went through it, you’ll get through it.” Why do images of a horse being led out to pasture enter my head when I hear these words? Because that’s essentially what we’re being told. When no longer fertile, when the skin isn’t as plump and firm and the hair is perhaps not as lustrous as in younger days, society seems to think we’re ready for a short, sensible grandma haircut and shoes. But look around…REALLY look around. Hear the whispers. Watch for the signs. We may not be saying the dreaded word, menopause, but it’s bubbling under the surface of our conversations. And it’s starting to show itself as something very different than your mom and grandma’s menopause.